Attempt to Assess

The GCE A/AS Level assessment objectives look at how well a candidate demonstrates the following:

Knowledge
Understanding
Personal Response
Communication
Opinion

(For more details, refer to the image above)

To provide a fair assessment of the students progress in meeting these requirements, my Mentor designed this feedback form. As a guide, we referred to the assessment criteria.

Prior to that, I also examined the sample answers provided by CIE.

The answers are intended to give an idea of the range of response and the requirements at the top, middle and bottom of the mark range. CIE stressed that the examples are not necessarily ideal or model answers, but are chosen as being representative answers on model texts.

Below is an example of a Grade A paper.

Example 1

With reference to two poems, discuss the ways the poets make universal comments out of their personal reflections and experiences.
In the two poems ‘Ozymandias’ by Percy Byshe Shelley and ‘Upon finding a small fly Crushed in a Book’ by Charles Tennyson Turner the poets take these reflections and experiences to make a universal comment on how man’s time on this earth will effect the marks we leave behind us, by taking seemingly menial observations and elevating them to contemplate deeper issues.
The title of the sonnet by Turner immediately suggests it will not be a typical ode to love however his archaic and elegiac form helps to take it from the demise of a fly to mournful poem not only for the fly. ‘Upon Finding a Small Fly Crushed in a Book’ does not only deal with uncommon subject matter but does not fit typical sonnet form, it is a mixture of both a Petrarchan style and Shakespearean, emphasising how Turner has used and twisted the sonnet to suit his purposes. The archaic language throughout the poem ‘thou’ ‘thine’ adds a more serious tone to the otherwise slightly comical topic matter. By creating the poem as an elegy, a mournful poem lamenting the dead the reader genuinely feels sorrow for the insects death and the continued mournful tone also creates a sense that he mourns for the short time on earth we all have and what we shall do with it.
By the use of Turner’s descriptive language and imager of the fly and the extended metaphor at the end of the sonnet Turner makes a comment on the time all man has to leave a mark on this world. Turner begins by claiming ‘Some had never meant to do thee harm’ by saying that this death was an accident and therefore unexpected begins to create a link to humanity through their shared mortality. He then goes on to say though dead the fly has left his own ‘fair monument’ as his ‘wings gleam out’ across the page. Despite the tone of death Turner uses words such as fair and gleam to create positive connotations relating to the mark left behind.
It is at the sestet that the poem turns to humanity by use of the interjection after ‘Oh’ a device used to formalise poems Turner creates a sense of envy and mournfulness as he wishes that ‘survive us here’ on earth had has much an impact as these tiny wings have on him. By use of the word memories Turner suggests at something intangible as though what people leave may not be what they leave to be seen but how it is that people remember them. It appears that these ‘Pure relics’ have forced Turner to contemplate his ‘doom’ and impending death, as he uses the fly and book as an extended metaphor for humanity and death.
He claims the ‘peril’ that found this fly is also with man and as the fly did they may one day decide to ‘soar/Upon the summer airs’ by this he means that man may come to a moment where life is beginning in a new positive direction and as they find their freedom and soar the ‘Book of death may close’. Their death may come unexpected and no longer will their book of life continue to write its story. However upon man’s death we may ‘leave no lustre on our page of death’ by using the plural ‘our’ Turner is including all of mankind in his contemplation and fears that too long of a wait before beginning to truly live may result in not leaving a mark on the world when life is cut short.
‘Ozymandias’ by Percy Byshe Shelley also deals with the idea of leaving a mark on the world. However Shelley feels that no matter how large and mighty this mark may appear it is insignificant in relation to time and nature. Shelley shows this comment through relating to the reader and experience in which the narrator heard a tale from a traveller. ‘The traveller from an antique land’ told a tale of an ancient statue of ‘Ozymandias: King of Kings’ an arrogant ruler who believed his works would stand the test of time however only ‘two vast and trunkless legs of stone’ are left in the middle of the desert. Though Ozymandias had ‘stamped’ on a pedestal ‘Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair’ there is irony in this comment as though there may be despair it is for the ‘colossal wreck’ as ‘Nothing beside remains’ Shelley leaves this ambiguous as it could mean that there is no longer anything around or what is left is only the remains of what may have once been a mighty entrance. Not only this but it is left ‘boundless and bare/As the lone and level sands stretch far away.’ It is completely deserted as the alliteration creates a continuous effect emphasising the pure emptiness.
Both Shelley and Turner have experiences leaving them concerned with the marks left behind after death though Shelley feels more that those left won’t last and Turner worries none will be left at all.
(Grade A)

Below is an example of a paper I had marked.
The topic: Discuss ways in which poets explore family relationships, referring to two poems from your selection.

I tend to make a lot of comments when I mark.
They are intended to show my students what I thought was done well, and to correct certain errors. I also tend to pose questions to get them to further explore matters beyond their finished piece of work.

In a separate lesson, I had highlighted repetitive words used in a piece of writing and only wrote 'Do you see what I see?' I followed up on this and the student recognized instantly what I was referring to. She was amused and shared that she had never noticed it till then.

The second part of the marking took a lot of time. I think the form is useful and helps me to focus and identify my students' strengths and weaknesses. Similarly, the students are also able to work on improving in specific areas.

Personally, as a teacher, I am still learning to be more effective in the feedback I provide as I feel that effective feedback can help the students to have a clear understanding of what they need to progress.

As I am new to teaching at this level and have had little time familiarizing with the syllabus and assessment objectives, I must admit that I struggled marking my students' work and was unsure about the grades I had awarded. Therefore, I asked for feedback from my Mentor regarding the matter to make sure that the marks given were a fair representation of the students' abilities based on the criteria set. After some discussion over a few papers, I was able to make the necessary amendments and gained confidence in the way I was assessing the work. I believe with more practice and further exposure I can improve in this area.